Giving, and seeking, and striving, and measuring, are all conceits that lead to nothing. Just as love isn't something to be meted out, or placed upon a scale, we, in our worldly view(s), we lose sight of the essential beauties around us, because of all the comparatives.
Plus, I like the Harlequin Romance fantasies!
Life is as simple as breathing, and when we treat it that way, we have less waste, less fraud, less abusive experiences. Which is why accepting what it is, is so much easier, than making it, what it's not. Love, and get it over with! Start with the kid who bags your groceries. Allow yourself the freedom to accept, and endure, without perfection, and your heart, as well as your spirit, will breath easier...