Because of Love;

I'd lock out my page.

Because of love, I've changed how I am in public.
Because of love, I'd delete anyone you asked me to.
Because of love, I can wait until the time comes.
Because of love, I could actually feel lighter, and more free.

Yes, love is tangible.
And yes, love is tactile.
Love proves it self in action and in deeds.

But sometimes,
all love is is a word.

Sometimes, it's just a post card, or a poem.

Sometimes, love is a simple hi, but I can't talk right now!

Me, I know what love is.
And sometimes, love is just three words that create a smile
within the heart of the person we love.

Call me weak, but I like love,
and anyway it chooses to reveal itself,
is more than alright with me!

Me, I just had to get that off my mind......

May I call you SunShine?

Some day’s sunshine,
I don’t actually write all the words I’ve considered.

And not just because there aren’t things, places, and/or people I’d like to write about, but oddly enough, my inability to get all these new words streaming towards the paper, originates not from being able to generate the necessary focus, but because, I can see far too clearly!

Wanting to write, desiring to express myself, is only part of my process around turning abstractions into words. More often, I am just breathing and that act of catching one new breath becomes a word that supports a sentence, which then becomes a meditation en route to a story.

Sometimes, people within my sensory areas can create a ripple that I can use as a story propellant, though mostly, it is through their subsurface pain and the things that I can discern that they are hiding from, that makes the window into a story open wide for me.

Even in the vacuum of a total stranger, a story is often revealed to me by often just the placement of their hands on a table, or a story is hidden under the flickering of their eyes. Sometimes, it’s even contained within the voice, in which they address a small child, that their story is told.

Wanting to follow and explore these stories are a great value to me, even though, they often cost me more than the completed narrative is worth. For the pain I must wade through, to get at the chance to see the boundaries of this new and exciting story, is neither as easily forgotten as I would like, nor as easily rendered into more than just an abstraction of the present moment, revealed in that instant.

Nonetheless, theses stories, these connected words from within others is something that I’ve never been able to turn away from. This, I eerily discovered when I grew old enough to seek more than a gentle touch from the others around me. Seems, each person that I more than casually touched, revealed something about themselves, whenever we connected long enough for me to see whatever was hidden in their smile.

Of course, some of those early stories were the best, if not but for the intense rush of revelation that washed over me in that instant we touched. Others, where so diabolically beautiful, it made me weep immediately with the knowledge, whereas some, some were just the vaporous and fantastical endeavors of the deceiver among us.

But each, each in their own way, were as sweet as the rains that used to fall out behind the homes in which I to lived when everything was new to me, back when none of this made sense to me!

But now I see clearly, that which I was just feeling then.

Words, words and the images that live within us all are the unrealized ideals that I am so unafraid of now. For now, I’ve grown in my acceptance of the unspoken fears and whispers of others. Now, I seem so ready to just move in the silent waves from within another, so as to be completely washed by the radiant embers of that life I can see, without really looking and discern without ever clearly hearing, and in that sunshine, is my peace, and daily thanksgiving. In that is the essence of why I came to be.

And though I’ve yet to learn the fate of this blessing, my embrace upon it has grown with the knowledge that it’s mine alone to share with you!

This morning

I found myself considering all those that I had really wanted to know better, and your smile revealed itself in my minds eyes.

Not knowing how your life has been over these few season of distance between us, I just wanted to show that I do indeed think about you often.

Dreaming

My love

would you kiss me again tonight
so soft
so gentle
arousing my deepest feelings
please, make it so sensual and alive.

My love

can you feel my kiss without your heart
so warm your lips felt as they parted
no words can be now spoken,
And yet, the meaning is true enough.

My love

that kiss will last forever within us
for it’s only for me and you to feel
that kiss from the your deepest heart
Burns still,
deeply inside my own.

Dreaming 2

Candles burning
sheets turned down
anticipation abounds.

In the Vancouver of my mind,
I can see candles burning
sheets yet to be turned down
and me waiting for your call.

Time passes slowly between us now I know
sometimes, quiet as a mouse
stars somewhere are falling down
and yet for me,
the earth is standing still.

Waiting
ethereally waiting
for another moment in your embrace.

In the distance, my phone rings.
in the new place where we’ll meet;
come get me now you whisper,
for I am you have arrived to become one again.

Passionate thoughts explode within me now
even thought the excitement is not yet in the air,
though soon you will be here,
and in that my heart grows.

Candles burning low
Sheets thrown down
Passions soon to be consumed
As a love grows
From it’s embrace!

Dreaming 3

Passions revealed from within,
desires not yet sedated,
never once before believed,
such pleasures I’ve awaited.

Romance claimed lost,
desires now girded,
no more ecstatic long nights,
and not, just fulfilling a need.

But with lingering glances,
on satiny smooth broen skin,
through the night we languish,
in the erotica of lovemaking.

A candle lit dinner,
alone to test our will,
champagne on ice (?),
inhibitions to chill.

A fire in the hearth,
our only light,
yet we hold back the urges,
as passion fills the long dark night.

Caressing the hair below your neck,
a massage designed to please,
your breathing grows softer,
a sensual tease.

Lips finally meet,
so tender and hoping,
tongues intertwine,
searching but still not groping.

Finger tips race,
from your neck down your spine, a
wakening nerves the pleasure,
my tongue surrenders to your sweet divine.

Cloths whispered as they fell to the floor,
bringing pleasure in the skin they show,
no rush no hurry, we have all night,
so let’s continue to take it slow.

A trail of kisses,
the soft back of knees bent,
body’s aching and yearning,
eager to please and reinvent.

By the light of the fire,
two body’s join in an ancient rite,
as soft moans of pleasure,
become the sounds of our good night.

Just after another midnight

For me, to have to consider another's intention(s)
Only leads me to believe that perhaps I needn't have paid attention.
A song I wrote many years ago contained the line:

"Sometimes, I know that she like me other times, I don't think so.
Sometimes, I feel like she needs me other times, I just don't know!"

Maybe for some,
The lack of knowledge,
Or even the suspense
of not knowing the truth

Is something that's pleasurable?

For me though,
Pleasure comes in understanding.
Pleasure comes in knowledge
Not in confusion, or abstraction.

Monday (somewhere in the world right now);
For some, starts the week anew.

And yet for me,
Sunday always draws me to the edge of this new week.

And on this coming Sunday, I will be refreshed in the knowledge that
In order for anything to work, as in, in order for a sports team, In order for a family,
in order for a relationship to work, There has to be a reciprocal understanding.

No, I didn't say equal partnership.
I said reciprocal understanding.

I do some.
You do some.

Just as a chef cooks the food.
And yet, without the pantry chefs prep,
Dinner will not be served.

Or like last night @ the club;
The bartender pours,
The waitress serves
The Dj spins
The party gets to pop pin!

Life thus, requires an ebb and flow as well.

Half way!
Or even part way sometimes!

But all the way myself?
Not if you want it all yourself.

In giving, in reaching beyond, and in not just only receiving,
then a true reciprocal understanding unfolds betweens
not just us two, and in that, a better life unfolds, grows,
and blends beautifully into a lasting bliss!

And in that, my weekend just got better.

I’ll share, because we all need to write someone;

In the between, true enough though, I was definitely coming that way, and then, I hesitated for no reason other than, well, I hesitated, and now I'll just have to wait until January to head back East.

And you, will you ever grace me with some of your undivided attention? Yes, I know the answer to that, but I wanted to be petulant. Anyhoo, the west is refreshing as always. Me and the queen mother are still enjoying each others company, she is persuaded by my cooking and affectionate ability to keep her on task, me, because down deep, think she's really nice.

Work is a problem, but I've been thinking of developing my coaching business again, so I am unfazed by the economy of the short side. Plus, I think there will be great opportunities to sell and/or provide services now that almost everybody is outsourcing labor to lower cost.

The weather is always great.
Some cold nights, a few rainy days, but nothing like the hawk!

Thanksgiving this year though will be festive. I have a good friend here (a Mexican brother, his Philippine wife, their son and I are close) who we will be sharing the festive table with. His mother in law moved here in September, and his mom and dad live near by, so we'll all hook up out in Eagle Point for a blend of traditional, Asian and soul food. It will be nice!

Well, I could say more, but, I better hold my tongue.
Always good to see your (personal) words in my inbox though. And of course, when you're not editing yourself, it's always a pleasure to read your deeper thoughts on-line. As always, be good in the between my friend(s), and remember; real love, like a really good life, is usually not reflected in what we think it should act, look, or even be like, and that's the reason why it's so good to have in the end!

Stillness yes, will put a floor underneath you, but real expression will set you free!

Most assuredly,

Edward Jr.

"Truly, I just like people to be themselves, and therefore,
open to the honesty that is contained, within us both!"

Finishing Our Work: Martin L. Friedman

"And so it came to pass that on Nov. 4, 2008, shortly after 11 p.m. Eastern time, the American Civil War ended, as a black man — Barack Hussein Obama — won enough electoral votes to become president of the United States.

A civil war that, in many ways, began at Bull Run, Virginia, on July 21, 1861, ended 147 years later via a ballot box in the very same state. For nothing more symbolically illustrated the final chapter of America's Civil War than the fact that the Commonwealth of Virginia — the state that once exalted slavery and whose secession from the Union in 1861 gave the Confederacy both strategic weight and its commanding general — voted Democratic, thus assuring that Barack Obama would become the 44th president of the United States.

This moment was necessary, for despite a century of civil rights legislation, judicial interventions and social activism — despite Brown v. Board of Education, Martin Luther King's I-have-a-dream crusade and the 1964 Civil Rights Act — the Civil War could never truly be said to have ended until America's white majority actually elected an African-American as president.

That is what happened Tuesday night and that is why we awake this morning to a different country. The struggle for equal rights is far from over, but we start afresh now from a whole new baseline. Let every child and every citizen and every new immigrant know that from this day forward everything really is possible in America.

How did Obama pull it off? To be sure, it probably took a once-in-a-century economic crisis to get enough white people to vote for a black man. And to be sure, Obama's better organization, calm manner, mellifluous speaking style and unthreatening message of "change" all served him well.

But there also may have been something of a "Buffett effect" that countered the supposed "Bradley effect" — white voters telling pollsters they'd vote for Obama but then voting for the white guy. The Buffett effect was just the opposite. It was white conservatives telling the guys in the men's grill at the country club that they were voting for John McCain, but then quietly going into the booth and voting for Obama, even though they knew it would mean higher taxes.

Why? Some did it because they sensed how inspired and hopeful their kids were about an Obama presidency, and they not only didn't want to dash those hopes, they secretly wanted to share them. Others intuitively embraced Warren Buffett's view that if you are rich and successful today, it is first and foremost because you were lucky enough to be born in America at this time — and never forget that. So, we need to get back to fixing our country — we need a president who can unify us for nation-building at home.

And somewhere they also knew that after the abysmal performance of the Bush team, there had to be consequences for the Republican Party. Electing McCain now would have, in some way, meant rewarding incompetence. It would have made a mockery of accountability in government and unleashed a wave of cynicism in America that would have been deeply corrosive.

Obama will always be our first black president. But can he be one of our few great presidents? He is going to have his chance because our greatest presidents are those who assumed the office at some of our darkest hours and at the bottom of some of our deepest holes.

"Taking office at a time of crisis doesn't guarantee greatness, but it can be an occasion for it," argued the Harvard University political philosopher Michael Sandel. "That was certainly the case with Lincoln, F.D.R. and Truman." Part of F.D.R.'s greatness, though, "was that he gradually wove a new governing political philosophy — the New Deal — out of the rubble and political disarray of the economic depression he inherited." Obama will need to do the same, but these things take time.

"F.D.R. did not run on the New Deal in 1932," said Sandel. "He ran on balancing the budget. Like Obama, he did not take office with a clearly articulated governing philosophy. He arrived with a confident, activist spirit and experimented. Not until 1936 did we have a presidential campaign about the New Deal. 

What Obama's equivalent will be, even he doesn't know. It will emerge as he grapples with the economy, energy and America's role in the world. These challenges are so great that he will only succeed if he is able to articulate a new politics of the common good."Bush & Co. did not believe that government could be an instrument of the common good. 

They neutered their cabinet secretaries and appointed hacks to big jobs. For them, pursuit of the common good was all about pursuit of individual self-interest. Voters rebelled against that. But there was also a rebellion against a traditional Democratic version of the common good — that it is simply the sum of all interest groups clamoring for their share. 

"In this election, the American public rejected these narrow notions of the common good," argued Sandel. "Most people now accept that unfettered markets don't serve the public good. Markets generate abundance, but they can also breed excessive insecurity and risk. Even before the financial meltdown, we've seen a massive shift of risk from corporations to the individual. 

Obama will have to reinvent government as an instrument of the common good — to regulate markets, to protect citizens against the risks of unemployment and ill health, to invest in energy independence.

"But a new politics of the common good can't be only about government and markets. "It must also be about a new patriotism — about what it means to be a citizen," said Sandel. "This is the deepest chord Obama's campaign evoked. The biggest applause line in his stump speech was the one that said every American will have a chance to go to college provided he or she performs a period of national service — in the military, in the Peace Corps or in the community. 

Obama's campaign tapped a dormant civic idealism, a hunger among Americans to serve a cause greater than themselves, a yearning to be citizens again."None of this will be easy. But my gut tells me that of all the changes that will be ushered in by an Obama presidency, breaking with our racial past may turn out to be the least of them. 

There is just so much work to be done. 

The Civil War is over.

Let reconstruction begin."


Amen.....

Right before your eyes:

In the reality of this moment, I guess I'm a little speechless.
what with the emotions, and the tactile feeling of change,
even I have to step back a few feet and take it all in.

So now what?

Is the era of unnecessary hatred and the
corresponding fear finally behind us?
Or is the ground beneath us going to start shaking
with the inevitable consequences of denial?

Me, I was weeping.

Then I was overjoyed beyond tears.

And really, this has nothing to do with the obvious,
and more to do with the ways, as of yet unimagined,
the world just changed.

Worshiping at the alter of Ken and Barbie,
living the unreal life of Hedge Funds and Golf Ranges,
what are the architects of our previous discomfort going to do now
that their world has been breached by the common American?

Yes, I lived in some of those red states too, and no,
I'm not all that concerned about what those people are up to,
for in the absence of an obvious leader, the herded masses
always sit quietly, waiting for someone to stir up their fears and anxieties,
and this time, at this moment, no one is prepared to go down that road.

Which brings me back to the present.

Change baby, real, concrete, undeniable change has happened.

Therefore I implore you, think stronger, speak bolder,
have the heart to say what you truly feel,
for this moment came for us all,
and if you can't embrace it,
time and timing has dictated in the past,
that without full acceptance of an opportunity,
that chance, that once in a life time surrender
will be snatched back before you(and I) know it.

Me, I have a lot to think about now.

Many things that I have neglected have to now be reconciled,
so that I can change too!

You, you had better wash in the euphoria of the here
and dam better right now,
and come correct.

For time is the weapon of change,
and wasting time is the opening that ensnares.