Some days, most days actually

When I'm past the counting, or just standing beside the aftermath, my mind always drifts back to the reality of why we do, those things, that we do, more often than not.

And sure, it's just part two, of what will be an overstimulating weekend, and yet, standing there, watching the parade go by, smelling humanity, the fears, the pleasures, the thoughts that people think I can't hear, and I was overwhelmed with how shallow it all was. And no, I'm not a cynic. I rejoice @ market swings, am uplifted by tornadoes, gain great strength from the smiles of two year olds.

It's just that, sometimes, underneath last nights make up, who are really?
No, not that answer again.

I mean, if I saw you, the naked you, the undistorted you, the you that you sometimes hide from yourself, would I be uplifted? Would the you that You "really" are, would that you bring out the love in me, or, would it cause me to run?

For some days, most days honestly, I just wonder why people have to bring their game face(s) to the after party. Why not just own you? Own who you're becoming, embrace whom you've been. Me, I'd love you anyway, but, in all honesty, I'd love you more! Just ask anyone who's withstood and endured, they'll tell you, long after last nights mysteries are revealed, a man who chooses to love the real you, never leaves.

It's those people who you've deceived, they leave every time.
Some days, long after I've been w/out my awakened self, I sleep...

Though yes Wednesday

I am always seeking to enhance Life's Beauty, and the constant growth of our friendship(s),

I've discovered early on,
that it's okay to love a one that struggles with the idea of Love,
for it's those in our lives, that hunger for love the most.

Me, going back down to the hospital this morning,
I recognize that I'll need to have another help around the house now,
& that my patience isn't really..

I was thinking about you today;

And this song, reminded me why you need to relax more!
"I'm the man with all I've wanted
All the toys and playing games
I am the one who pours your coffee
Corner booth each Saturday

I am your daughter's favorite teacher
I'm the leader of the band
I sit behind you in the bleachers
I am Every Man

I'm the coach of every winning team
And still a loser in my mind
I am the soldier in the airport
Facing giants one more time

I am the woman shamed and haunted
By the cry of unborn life
I am every broken man
Nervous child, lonely wife

Is there hope for every man'
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man?

Is there love that never dies?
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man

It seems there are just so many roads to travel
It's hard to tell where they will lead
My life is scarred, my dreams unraveled
Now I am scared to take the lead
If I could find someone to follow
Who knows my pain and feels the way
The uncertainty of my tomorrow
The guilt and pain of yesterday
Is there hope for every man?

A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies?

Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man?
There is hope for every man!
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man

There is love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?

Jesus is hope for every man!

There is hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man
There is love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?

Jesus is hope for every man!"

Me, I just wanted to share....

Edited for deeper consumption

You know;

The world always seems so huge during those moments of indecision, until that is, you take a moment to reflect upon your part in it, and then, the memories of things to come, seem less challenging, than those moments that, have long passed behind us.

Which is why me, on a that particular Monday filled with so much promise, I just wanted to state what might not be obvious to you just then. Life, even a one as confusing and challenging as your own, is often, so much more rewarding, when you allow yourself to compare and contrast it, to the life you would have had, without it.

Yes, I know, we're no longer in Montreal, or for that matter, Monrovia, but, the alternative to trying hard, and crying every once in a while is nothing worth breathing around, and from that kind of darkness, not even I could see a better future!

So, breath deep, pour out a little, and thank your toes.
For with feet, there's motion. And in motion, change, and the winds thereof, happen...