Some day’s sunshine,
I don’t actually write all the words I’ve considered.
And not just because there aren’t things, places, and/or people I’d like to write about, but oddly enough, my inability to get all these new words streaming towards the paper, originates not from being able to generate the necessary focus, but because, I can see far too clearly!
Wanting to write, desiring to express myself, is only part of my process around turning abstractions into words. More often, I am just breathing and that act of catching one new breath becomes a word that supports a sentence, which then becomes a meditation en route to a story.
Sometimes, people within my sensory areas can create a ripple that I can use as a story propellant, though mostly, it is through their subsurface pain and the things that I can discern that they are hiding from, that makes the window into a story open wide for me.
Even in the vacuum of a total stranger, a story is often revealed to me by often just the placement of their hands on a table, or a story is hidden under the flickering of their eyes. Sometimes, it’s even contained within the voice, in which they address a small child, that their story is told.
Wanting to follow and explore these stories are a great value to me, even though, they often cost me more than the completed narrative is worth. For the pain I must wade through, to get at the chance to see the boundaries of this new and exciting story, is neither as easily forgotten as I would like, nor as easily rendered into more than just an abstraction of the present moment, revealed in that instant.
Nonetheless, theses stories, these connected words from within others is something that I’ve never been able to turn away from. This, I eerily discovered when I grew old enough to seek more than a gentle touch from the others around me. Seems, each person that I more than casually touched, revealed something about themselves, whenever we connected long enough for me to see whatever was hidden in their smile.
Of course, some of those early stories were the best, if not but for the intense rush of revelation that washed over me in that instant we touched. Others, where so diabolically beautiful, it made me weep immediately with the knowledge, whereas some, some were just the vaporous and fantastical endeavors of the deceiver among us.
But each, each in their own way, were as sweet as the rains that used to fall out behind the homes in which I to lived when everything was new to me, back when none of this made sense to me!
But now I see clearly, that which I was just feeling then.
Words, words and the images that live within us all are the unrealized ideals that I am so unafraid of now. For now, I’ve grown in my acceptance of the unspoken fears and whispers of others. Now, I seem so ready to just move in the silent waves from within another, so as to be completely washed by the radiant embers of that life I can see, without really looking and discern without ever clearly hearing, and in that sunshine, is my peace, and daily thanksgiving. In that is the essence of why I came to be.
And though I’ve yet to learn the fate of this blessing, my embrace upon it has grown with the knowledge that it’s mine alone to share with you!
About Me
- Edward Thomas
- More than just a Man, but also, a human being as well; Me, I'm just as often found @ the center of the struggle, but never as someones absent minded follower. True enough, I love my Mother, and though I'm eager to be perfect, I actually prefer to be nice, than have my own way! When asked, my closest friends would say that I am often in the company of the wind: The Wind(a dear friend of mine since birth) and I are often near and around you, and though, we're not always seen or felt near you, it's always better understood within you. Odd I know, but true nonetheless. True, not unlike the truth contained withing the thought of me flying would appear, but then again, when the wind wills, well, often I've awoken in strange places and had to patiently await his return, so as to get back home again. Luckily, he never lingers long, for it's hard enough explaining my discernment (of)to people. Imagine the after shock of a early morning phone call from Cleveland???
