And yet, who really cares

So yes, my files were read. 

So, maybe some woman who could have had a chance, doesn't anymore? Nothing can be done about that. Me, I've had my lap top gone over w/a fine tooth comb, changed my passwords to an encrypted cypher, and, I've told everyone who needed to hear it, Please, stop or get ready to lawyer up.

And yes Charlotte the most important connection w/another for me, is really through their mind & then, sharing the power contained within their spirit, but so often, people play around the margins of themselves, sharing & withholding, allowing & drawing away as it seems important for the game of discovery, but what for?

Me, I'm unafraid of reality, for there it is anyway!

Sting said it 1st(but it's no less real);

Whenever I say your name, whenever I call to mind your face

Whatever bread's in my mouth,
whatever the sweetest wine that I taste

Whenever your memory feeds my soul,
whatever got broken becomes whole

Whenever I'm filled with doubts that we will be together

Wherever I lay me down, wherever I put my head to sleep

Whenever I hurt and cry, whenever I got to lie awake and weep

Whenever I kneel to pray, whenever I need to find a way

I'm calling out your name

Whenever those dark clouds hide the moon

Whenever this world has gotten so strange

I know that something's gonna change

Something's gonna change

Whenever I say your name,

Whenever I say your name,
I'm already praying, I'm already praying

I'm already filled with a joy that I can't explain

Wherever I lay me down, wherever I rest my weary head to sleep

Whenever I hurt and cry, whenever I got to lie awake and weep

Whenever I'm on the floor

Whatever it was that I believed before

Whenever I say your name,

whenever I say it loud,

I'm already praying

Whenever this world has got me down, whenever I shed a tear

Whenever the TV makes me mad,
whenever I'm paralyzed with fear

Whenever those dark clouds fill the sky,
whenever I lose the reason why

Whenever I'm filled with doubts that we will be together

Whenever the sun refuse to shine,
whenever the skies are pouring rain

Whatever I lost I thought was mine
whenever I close my eyes in pain

Whenever I kneel to pray, whenever I need to find a way

I'm calling out your name

Whenever this dark begins to fall

Whenever I'm vulnerable and small

Whenever I feel like I could die

Whenever I'm holding back the tears that I cry

Whenever I say your name, whenever I call to mind your face

I'm already praying

Hack attack & Weirdness;

You know, for me, being single, seeking connection, I am always surprised by the viciousness of the people whose actions, force me to leave them behind. Not that I'm shocked, but stunned would be more like it!

Over the past few days(allegedly), a friend of mine has been harassed to no end by what I'm sure is her present want to be lover,  but alas, because I'm the object of this persons concern, my yahoo and msn(hotmail) accounts have been violated. Now why is that? And better still, what is the point of scaring someone into loving you?

Sure, when I was in HS, I would take my date to the Freddy Movies, so that she would get all worked up and need to be hugged and cuddle, which now that I've written that, really only caused more harm than it was worth, but still, @ this age, in the global environment in which we have access to, why do people still feel the need to fixate?

Anyhoo, off to the studio for me.

But I just wanted to say, being vindictive, never improved anyone well being. Unless that's the point....

Peace

Peace comes we understand that the desired outcome is Love.

Impatience then(in or out of Love), often leads to frustration.

For in truth, it is whatever it is, and trying to make it be something that it isn't presently, is only going to make it worse!

And yes, you knew that already, so this week, go slowly, think as clearly as your individual circumstances allow, and in that, you'll not only find rest, but the energy to push through the fog of right now.

Which honestly, is temporary.

Me, I'm hoping to get back to the road in the fall, and if I'm in a city near you, I'll get the times and location up as soon as I know for sure, what the engagement is.

In the between, believe in your own heart.
It got you this far, and it'll be with you til the end..

This is a real Holiday after all

Labor Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the first Monday in September (September 6 in 2010). The first Labor Day in the United States was celebrated on September 5, 1882 in New York City. It became a federal holiday in 1894, when, following the deaths of a number of workers at the hands of the U.S. military and U.S. Marshals during the Pullman Strike, President Grover Cleveland put reconciliation with the labor movement as a top political priority. Fearing further conflict, legislation making Labor Day a national holiday was rushed through Congress unanimously and signed into law a mere six days after the end of the strike.

Or, if you prefer: The first Labor Day was held in 1882. Its origins stem from the desire of the Central Labor Union to create a holiday for workers. It became a federal holiday in 1894. It was originally intended that the day would be filled with a street parade to allow the public to appreciate the work of the trade and labor organizations. After the parade, a festival was to be held to amuse local workers and their families. In later years, prominent men and women held speeches. This is less common now, but is sometimes seen in election years. One of the reasons for choosing to celebrate this on the first Monday in September was to add a holiday in the long gap between Independence Day and Thanksgiving.

Either way, enjoy the time safely with your friends and family!Just remember that the facts should never obscure the pleasure, for often, they enhance the sacrifice that was made on our behalf, which is what an actual Holiday should be about...

Here's this then;

Loving yourself, w/out the mirror others try to hold against you is the 1st sign that you're an individual, an not just another one of the sheep. Yes, I can and will test your limits, and outside of them, create opportunities for you to to surrender deeper than you've more than likely anticipated. But in all honesty, what else could you possibly want from me?

I like the song line that goes: "I do not feel that two have to have exact likes/dislikes to be compatable as friends or lovers." for in that, I can see the possibilities between people, and that's good, for in being a woman, as a Man, I see you as well.

Anyhoo, off to the final accomplishment of the day. You, wherever this may find you, breath deep, for air sometimes is more precious than self, but in releasing it, sometimes, you're more free than you had previously thought possible...

Thursday finds me reflective

In life, as in love, there are believers, and those that can not, for their own ignorance, anger, and fears. For you then, the key is to be the best You can be, as for those who don't understand, allow that to be the reflection and/or prism you view them through!

For life is about love, pain, and the occasional slaughter. 


We, those who love, seek love, and embrace all that love is about; our job isn't to accept the burdens placed upon by those that seek the darkness. Our job is to step into, and under the light, whenever we're able. He forgives, we never forget, and in all honesty, that's enough.

The eX sent a fb request, that included;

"Your children are not your children, for they are the sons and the daughters of life's longing for itself. They come through you, but yet, are not from you. And though they are with you for a season, they belong not to you only.

You may give them your love, but not your thoughts,
for they have their own thoughts to discover.
You may house their bodies but not their souls.
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your diminishing dreams!

Your children are not your children,
for though you may strive to be like them,
but please, never seek to make them like you!

You though, you are the bows from which your children,
as living arrows are sent forth!

Let your bending then, in the archer's bow, be for their gladness alone."


And yes, I put an edit upon it, for some of it was true enough...

On this (Tues)day;

Another in which, as I awoke, and thought of all that was on my personal horizon(s), I still found time to think of you! 

To think about how you're such a blessing to so many of course, but more, about how you're such a blessing to me.

And so, on this day when you and all your strength(s) will be yet again tested, I just wanted to remind you that you're more than just someones wife, or, someones mother, daughter or friend, you, you're incredibly special as an individual, and in this world, at this time, that's something amazing, indeed! 

Liberty Thoughts(reprinted)

"Yesterday we celebrated an event that took place in the 18th century. It is an unusual event to commemorate with a holiday — not the first shot in a battle or the toppling of a government but the broadcasting, as it was in those days, of a proposition about the nature and the rights of human beings. How fruitful, how reasonable, how correct that proposition was, we have seen again and again throughout our history. 

That proposition was the Declaration of Independence.We know the words well, but they bear repeating: “That all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.”The men responsible for the ideas in that document could, of course, know nothing of our world, and even with all the aids of history, we can hardly imagine what it was like to be alive in theirs, in 1776.

How capacious an idea the Declaration contains becomes clear when you realize that it still contains us all, however we vote, however we choose to celebrate this day.We live in our historical moment. And yet we are the product of a very different moment, a time when a group of men, driven onward by the pen of Thomas Jefferson, felt certain they could enunciate truths that were universal, good for all time.
Their claims were stunningly bold, both politically and philosophically. There are intellectual precedents to the Declaration. But there is only one Declaration. We are still enacting its thesis, still, after all these years, learning how to embody its aspirations. It is not just a matter of trying to remain true to Jefferson’s words. The strength and the wonder of this country is that the words remain true to us."

It's that time again

Though true enough, many have cause to celebrate this day, the alleged birth of a nation, but what of the sacrifice, what of those sacrificed? Do you think they're celebrating? 

Me, I wonder about much, like why kids spend summers away from a parent they want to be with, or worse, by themselves(?)! Joy though, joy is not a wonder for me, and I thank Him for that...

Jesus, Declare His Name(lyrics for PMNW

You can hear it playing @ www.prayermountainnw.com

Verse 1 

Nations gather, hearts are yearning to be free

Come together, sing His song of liberty

Verse 2

Nations gather, eyes are lifted to His face

Lord forever, captivating all with grace

Chorus:

Jesus- Declare His nameOver the earth, sing of His fame

Jesus- Heaven come downLift your voices hear the sound, declare His name

Verse 3

Tribe and nation, raise the banner of our King

Sovereign Savior, Only God, our praise we bring

Tribe and nation, rising up to speak His name

True Salvation, comes from He alone who reigns

Bridge:

In heaven and earth be magnified
In heaven and earth be lifted highIn heaven and earth be magnifiedIn heaven and earth be lifted high

©2009 Melissa Saulnier & Michael Bahn / Northern Gate Publishing & Found in You Music

(Admin. By Oikeo Music) CCLI# 5548356

Some days, most days actually

When I'm past the counting, or just standing beside the aftermath, my mind always drifts back to the reality of why we do, those things, that we do, more often than not.

And sure, it's just part two, of what will be an overstimulating weekend, and yet, standing there, watching the parade go by, smelling humanity, the fears, the pleasures, the thoughts that people think I can't hear, and I was overwhelmed with how shallow it all was. And no, I'm not a cynic. I rejoice @ market swings, am uplifted by tornadoes, gain great strength from the smiles of two year olds.

It's just that, sometimes, underneath last nights make up, who are really?
No, not that answer again.

I mean, if I saw you, the naked you, the undistorted you, the you that you sometimes hide from yourself, would I be uplifted? Would the you that You "really" are, would that you bring out the love in me, or, would it cause me to run?

For some days, most days honestly, I just wonder why people have to bring their game face(s) to the after party. Why not just own you? Own who you're becoming, embrace whom you've been. Me, I'd love you anyway, but, in all honesty, I'd love you more! Just ask anyone who's withstood and endured, they'll tell you, long after last nights mysteries are revealed, a man who chooses to love the real you, never leaves.

It's those people who you've deceived, they leave every time.
Some days, long after I've been w/out my awakened self, I sleep...

Though yes Wednesday

I am always seeking to enhance Life's Beauty, and the constant growth of our friendship(s),

I've discovered early on,
that it's okay to love a one that struggles with the idea of Love,
for it's those in our lives, that hunger for love the most.

Me, going back down to the hospital this morning,
I recognize that I'll need to have another help around the house now,
& that my patience isn't really..

I was thinking about you today;

And this song, reminded me why you need to relax more!
"I'm the man with all I've wanted
All the toys and playing games
I am the one who pours your coffee
Corner booth each Saturday

I am your daughter's favorite teacher
I'm the leader of the band
I sit behind you in the bleachers
I am Every Man

I'm the coach of every winning team
And still a loser in my mind
I am the soldier in the airport
Facing giants one more time

I am the woman shamed and haunted
By the cry of unborn life
I am every broken man
Nervous child, lonely wife

Is there hope for every man'
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man?

Is there love that never dies?
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man

It seems there are just so many roads to travel
It's hard to tell where they will lead
My life is scarred, my dreams unraveled
Now I am scared to take the lead
If I could find someone to follow
Who knows my pain and feels the way
The uncertainty of my tomorrow
The guilt and pain of yesterday
Is there hope for every man?

A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies?

Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man?
There is hope for every man!
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man

There is love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?

Jesus is hope for every man!

There is hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man
There is love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?

Jesus is hope for every man!"

Me, I just wanted to share....

Edited for deeper consumption

You know;

The world always seems so huge during those moments of indecision, until that is, you take a moment to reflect upon your part in it, and then, the memories of things to come, seem less challenging, than those moments that, have long passed behind us.

Which is why me, on a that particular Monday filled with so much promise, I just wanted to state what might not be obvious to you just then. Life, even a one as confusing and challenging as your own, is often, so much more rewarding, when you allow yourself to compare and contrast it, to the life you would have had, without it.

Yes, I know, we're no longer in Montreal, or for that matter, Monrovia, but, the alternative to trying hard, and crying every once in a while is nothing worth breathing around, and from that kind of darkness, not even I could see a better future!

So, breath deep, pour out a little, and thank your toes.
For with feet, there's motion. And in motion, change, and the winds thereof, happen...